Doug Ellis: the epitome of fatherhood

By Donald S. Conkey – Two events occurred last week that reinforced my belief that God lives and is still in charge – and that the Preacher was right, that there is a time to be born and a time to die. The first event was a visit by our nine month old grandson Wyatt. The second event was the funeral of dear friend William Douglas Ellis where I delivered his eulogy. My friend was nearly 88 years. He was a WW II purple-heart veteran who went in at Omaha Beach June 6, 1944, a husband, father, grandfather and a great grandfather.

These two events sharply focus the beginning and the ending of life. Wyatt has just recently left his Father-in-Heaven’s presence to gain a mortal body and Doug was in the process of returning back into the presence of his Father-in-Heaven having just completed his mortal sojourn on earth. While he was leaving his mortal body behind his spirit, now separated from his body, was filled with that wisdom that comes from living a long challenging life.

Wyatt’s skin is soft and pliable and his mind is like a sponge ready to soak up the wisdom that comes from living a challenging, productive and obedient life. Doug’s skin was hard and wrinkled from living a long challenging productive life. This was Wyatt’s time to be born into mortality and it was Doug’s time to die and leave mortality. Watching Wyatt learning to crawl was joyful. Looking at Doug in his flag draped coffin reminded me of the sure certainty of mortal death.

The concluding speaker was Doug’s eldest son Larry. He paid tribute to his father at his father’s funeral, a powerful tribute about how a father changed a son’s life, more than once, but not as the world would have changed his life, but more as the Savior would have changed it – using gentle persuasion and example. It was a message about how a father had taught his son to walk in the ways of the Lord– after having taught him God’s laws regarding life and what is required to complete one’s life journey in mortality and qualify for life eternal.

Larry alluded to a scripture in Exodus 18:20 that reads “And thou shalt teach them ordinances and laws, and shalt shew them the way wherein they must walk, and the work they must do,” It was evident that this son believed his father had been obedient to this commandment –that his father had taught him about the ordinances (laws) of both man and God – and that he had taught him about the work he must do in mortality – including serving his fellow man.

At age 19 young men in our church are encouraged to serve a He told of how his father had influenced his life for good. two year church mission, but as everyone who has raised boys knows a young man can be an agent unto themselves – feeling no loyalty to a family’s expectations or culture. He told how he had made up his mind to forego a mission to join the military and get married and had expected a strong argument from his father. Doug, in a calm voice, simply said “Larry you have been taught correct principles, you know what is expected of you, but it’s your choice, and your mother and I believe you will make the right choice.” Gentle words that changed a son’s life! Larry served a mission, completed his education, and raised a family while serving his fellow man as a bishop and stake president in Alaska.

He then told how his father had taught him the power of prayer – of how to communicate with his Father-in-Heaven. Doug’s wife Marion had a large tumor in her brain that would have likely taken her life without the Lord interceding. One night after returning from the hospital his father took his three children into a room, knelt with them and prayed for the life of his beloved wife. She lived! By example Doug had shown his children how to communicate with God and about the power of personal prayer. Likewise, Larry said, “dad taught me about the necessity of the temple ordinances and their role in opening the door to life eternal.” When Larry finished there were few dry eyes in the crowded chapel.

Doug Ellis’ life was the epitome of fatherhood in action – a life that if emulated by the world’s fathers would quickly change the world and bring peace to an embattled world.

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